Novak Genetic Laboratories
From the CEO...
Welcome and thank you for visiting Novak Genetic Laboratories! Our mission is to preserve the beauty of nature via hybridization processes that allow common fauna and flora to thrive within traditionally unfriendly climates. Similar to our friends at BASF, we are not in the business to create novel and exotic products, but we do ensure that what we currently enjoy within our shared ecosphere is better. Via our robust research and development programs, the team at Novak Genetic Laboratories ensures that humanity never loses arboreal species that are iconic parts of the human experience. In addition, we would be unable to fund our work without the generous support of people such as yourselves, so I invite you to shop our selection of genetically modified plant life that is sure to be a welcomed addition to your residences and businesses. On behalf of my team, thank you for visiting Novak Genetic Laboratories...NGL: It's a Big Deal!
The X-1: A Game Changer
Our first breakthrough in climate-conscious hybridization was the X-1 Cold-Weather Palm Tree. Thousands of manhours and millions of dollars in research and development resulted in a truly exceptional and resilient palm tree that remained hardy in temperatures in a range from 17 to 132 degrees Fahrenheit. Today, the most expansive example of the success of the X-1 Cold-Weather Palm Tree can be found lining the driveway of our CEO's home outside of Silverton, Oregon, where not a single X-1 Cold-Weather Palm Tree has succumbed to the elements or genetic unviability. A truly remarkable specimen and one of our best sellers, the X-1 Cold-Weather Palm Tree remains the symbol of the true birth of Novak Genetic Laboratories, NGL: It's a Big Deal!
Cold-Weather Palm Trees
(Coming Soon)
Hot-Weather Shrubbery
(Coming Soon)
Any-Weather Greenery
(Coming Soon)
Carnivorous Peculiarities
(Coming Soon)
This is a parody site and, thus, not used to promote or sell any products or impart factual information.Â